On Quitting (Again)
Let me be clear: my list of quitting things I started is borderline embarrassing and I’m the furthest thing from proud of it.
I used to believe that something was wrong with me because I had the incessant ability to start something and rarely ever see it to completion. From me Marie Kondo-ing every drawer in my house only to ditch the whole sparking-joy movement weeks later. To the process of every morning, at 11AM, checking my inbox which lasted for literally about three days. There’s this school year when I started a schedule of braiding my daughters hair every two weeks to just mustering enough energy to give her one ponytail for going on six weeks. That’s just a few examples of many things. You name it, I started it and probably quit it.
For many seasons, my patterns were been start, quit, spend days (or weeks) disappointed in myself, then start something different. Quit … repeat. You see where this is going. Not a great cycle, more like a crazy one.
The thing is that I’ve spent more time focusing on the “what” I was starting and barely any time, if any, on “why” I was starting. I’ve also learned that it’s not the goal that leads to achievement - it’s the habits that I have in place. Before starting something we have to audit the habits we have in place that will be the runway for success and getting off the ground with my goal.
I’ve come a long way over years. Listen, I’m not perfect in the habit domain, but I am a reformed quitter. I’m addressing my habits so they support my intentions.
If you find yourself thinking about all the things that you wished you’d finished, but actually quit. Fix your focus. Begin, again. If you’re still breathing, you’ve got another chance.
Here’s a quick checklist to check before you start something new:
1. Why are you starting?
2. Is the “why” you’re doing this something that you should be pursuing this season in life?
3. What habits should you focus on implementing before starting the new thing?
While we’re on the subject of quitting, let’s name a few things that we should absolutely quit immediately!
1. Beating yourself up. Give yourself some grace. No one has it all figured out and we all have things we can get better at doing.
2. Comparing yourself. No faster way to zap all the joy out of your life than to compare where you are in life to where someone else may be. Your journey is as unique as your fingerprints, and please don’t compare your journey to someone on the internet. Honey, not many people are posting about their most recent failure or deepest insecurity. Live your life!
3. Not being yourself. You have a unique gifting, purpose, and personality. As quirky as it may be, we need what you’ve got. Show up as you!
So, if you’ve quit a million times, so what! Start over better and wiser. If you’re not a quitter and pretty much smash every goal you set - go you! I want to know your secret, and I certainly have a lot I could learn from you!
Wherever you are on your journey, keep going.
Take care of yourself and your dreams,
Endia ✨
